Everybody Hates The Mayor

The Redskins are looking for a few good SNITCHES......

2011-09-19T15:11:00.006-04:00

Last time I took to the blogosphere, I was applauding the Washington Redskins for "righting a wrong" that took place before a game last season.

A lot has changed since then.

After a locked out off season, The Redskins, led by Bruce Allen and Mike Shanahan, quietly put together a team that is currently 2-0, and solely in 1st place in the NFC East.

FedEx Field has removed nearly 10,000 seats, started running on solar power, and in my opinion, improved the game day experience for us Redskins fans.

Today I was surfing for Redskins news on Extremeskins.com, the Official Message Board of The Washington Redskins, and found this.

Yes. PFUFA Member Chris Lopez, aka Pez is coordinating a "neighborhood watch" inside FedEx Field. Keep in mind, "Pez" is not employed by the Washington Redskins, nor is he employed by FedEx Field in any capacity.

In fact, I called both Redskins Park, and FedEx Field, and Redskin officials "had no idea" what I was talking about.

Per the Extremeskins post, The Redskins will not compensate you with anything in return.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes the only way to get someones attention is a good punch in the face. It always gets my attention when I get a right hook to the jaw, but for the most part, I don't condone anything that interrupts Redskin fans from watching Redskins games at FedEx Field. Fighting included.

That being said, enlisting "snitches" on the Redskins Official Message Board, and citing that the Redskins are looking for "a few good fans", when the Redskins have made no such requests on record, is one of the biggest bitch type moves I have ever seen.

Let the police, police, let the security, secure and let the fans be just that. Fans.

And Pez, before you start asking people to be snitches, maybe you should review the Prince Georges fire codes before you, get snitched on.

Everybody Hates the Mayor, except The Washington Redskins

2010-12-15T10:39:00.004-05:00

It's been a while since I posted on this blog, but it's time to dust this thing off, and write about a few things that have occurred the past few days.

I will start with the past Sunday, December 12th. Myself, The President and both of our girlfriends arrived at FedEx Field at 7:45 AM, and parked on Arena Drive, our usual resting spot outside the stadium, waiting to enter the parking lot, to set up the DTC Tailgate. We usually arrive earlier, but due to the weather, we decided that the later arrival time would keep us slightly drier. After all, the forecast for Sunday was cold and rainy.

We parked the Expedition in line, got out, and greeted the familiar faces on Arena Drive. After saying hello to our friends, I let a few people know, that i had extra tickets and extra parking passes that I had purchased for a friend that was not able to make the game now.

I had a orange pass and a 4 tickets,. 2 lowers, 2 uppers. I have been going to Redskins games for 13 years now. I know the market. I know that I will be lucky to get even half of what I paid for these tickets. It's going to be an even harder task, as there are the usual scalpers patrolling Arena drive looking to buy tickets as cheap as possible, and sell them for a modest profit.

I start asking anybody if they need tickets, and to no surprise, they not only don't need tickets, they have extra tickets themselves.

I see a US Marine driving through, and while he is slowly driving to the front gate, I ask him if he is going to the game. He said he was, and told me he was "sitting in the upper deck". I said not anymore, and gave him my 2 lower level tickets for free. A gesture he greatly appreciated.

I still had 2 uppers and an orange pass. I start walking down Arena Drive, holding the pass in the air, asking of anyone needs it. An older gentleman asks how much, I say $20 (I paid $35 for this pass), he then informed me that he was a Vietnam Vet, and I said $10. He accepted, and I made the transaction.

As I was walking away, I was stopped by a PG County Police officer, and told in a stern voice, to get on the ground. At this point, there were a few scalpers and a guy selling ponchos, I figured he was talking to them, and I kept walking. GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND said the officer in a louder, angrier tone. Yes. He was talking to me. I told the officer the ground was wet, and I didn't do anything wrong. I was told if I didn't get on the ground, and I didn't "shut my fucking mouth" that I would be taken to jail. While the PG County Jail was probably warmer than Arena drive, and protected from the elements, I still felt like wet ground was a better option for me, so I complied.

I was then handcuffed, and searched. Still not being told of my offense. After he searched me, he removed the handcuffs, and forced me to the curb, where I sat on the wet pavement, trying to figure out what I did wrong, while Redskins Nation was watching me.

Another officer showed up, holding the parking pass I just sold. At this point, I come to the realization that the police think I am a ticket scalper. I inform them both, that I am just a regular fan, trying to not take a total loss on unused tickets and parking passes. I was told to shut up.

After about an hour, my drivers license was returned, and I was given a ticket. The ticket was for $200, and read. "For selling NFL related merchandise within a 2 mile radius of the 50 yard line at FedEx Field. The Police officer told me and the other detainees that this order came from Dan Snyder directly, and in fact their sole purpose at the stadium was to prevent ticket scalping and merchandise peddling, and that they were paid by Dan Snyder directly.

As you can only imagine, The Mayor of FedEx Field felt betrayed. How the hell could this happen to me, a loyal Redskin fan, one who hasn't missed a home game in 12 years. Rain. Sleet. Snow. Poor performances year after year by the team I love, and I still give them 100% support.

I was very upset and was telling my story to the Redskin fans that witnessed this unbelievable sequence of events.

I should be mad. I was harassed, embarrassed, threatened, and mistreated. And for what? Taking a $25 loss on a parking pass?

On Monday, still upset from what happened on Sunday, I decided to inform Redskins nation about this, and I took my story to Extremeskins. Met with the usual DTC Hatred that we have come to expect from the losers at Extremeskins, the thread turned into a anti-DTC and anti-Mayor conversation. After being removed from the site, and me, being banned from the site until March 14, 2011, I felt even more slighted by the organization.

Those feelings ended today, after Tony Wyllie of the Washington Redskins called my cellphone to not only apologize for the incident, but to assure me that not only was the police department acting on their own, but that Dan Snyder NEVER made such commands to the PG County Police, and that Dan Snyder knows and likes the DTC.

Two days ago I was considering turning in my "fan card", today, I renewed it for life.

This meant a lot to me. That a high ranking member of the Washington Redskins would call me and apologize on behalf of the PG County Police. To call me and reassure me that every Redskin fan was important to the organization, including myself.

I have been a fan of this team since I can remember. I remember watching the 1987 Super Bowl with my dad, I was 7 years old at the time. I remember my first game at FedEx Field in 1997 when Gus Frerotte threw a fade pass to Michale Westbrook in overtime to beat the Arizona Cardinals in the first game at the new stadium

I remember when the Redskin were 0-5 in 2001, and Lavar Arrington intercepted a pass from Chris Weinke and took it to the house, reversing that streak and winning the next 5 games.

But those memories have taken a back seat, as I will always remember today. Today is when the Redskins proved to me that they do care about their fans more than anything. Today is the day the Redskin organization justified my lifelong support of the team. Today is the day that I NEVER question the owner of this team, Dan Snyder again.

Today is the day I am proudest to be a Redskins fan.

I just put on my Heath Shuler jersey, my 1999 Division Champions hat, and my 1993 Starter jacket.

Today is a good day to be a Redskins fan.

HAIL TO THE REDSKINS!

HAIL DAN SNYDER!

HAIL THE DEAD TREE CREW!

Official Statement from The Mayor of FedEx Field

2009-06-23T10:55:00.002-04:00

The DTC has been made aware of the new changes to tailgating at FedEx Field for the 2009 NFL Season.

At this time, we believe the DTC Tailgate will be unaffected by these changes, and the DTC has every intention of continuing to throw the biggest, baddest and loudest tailgate in the parking lot.

Some tailgates will be affected however, and the DTC fully supports those groups and is asking that everyone that attends the DTC tailgate, any Redskins tailgate, or any tailgate period sign the following online petition.

www.savetailgating.com

While I don't think the Redskins have intended to disrupt any organized tailgate on purpose, their new rules clearly affect m
ultiple organized tailgates.

So please help your fellow Redskin fans out with this!

Thank you in advance!

The Mayor of FedEx Field
www.deadtreecrew.com

The Mayor is up for an award...........

2008-09-06T16:36:00.005-04:00

A few weeks ago, I renamed my blog to Everybody Hates the Mayor. Apparently for good reason.

Yesterday I was emailed a link to some Denver area blog that decided I was the front runner for an upcoming award.

Yes NFL fans. I have been nominated for "Most Douchiest Douchebag award" for 2008.

This by world renowned blogger, Joe Tone. Never heard of him? Join the club. He writes for Westword. What was that? You haven't heard of that either? You just joined 2 clubs today!

Obviously he has a loyal reader base, and when I say loyal reader base, I mean Internet nobodies that know who I am and what the DTC is.

Yep. The same commenters that are telling me, I never miss "a mention of myself" but seem to also never miss a mention of myself. How ironic.

But hey. I might win an award. This is cause for celebration.

Break out the high quality chronic, the cheap liquor and the Oxycontin.

DTC Tracks: That's the Captains

2008-09-06T11:25:00.003-04:00

The year was 2005. The Washington Redskins had a busy off season adding such future stars as Santana Moss and Jason Campbell, the Dead Tree Crew was hard at work in the studio laying down some DTC tracks.

While you probably have heard Hit a Motherfucking Eagle Fan, Welcome to FedEx and D.T.C, there are about 7 solid tracks that never were released. Thought to be lost and never recovered due to the CEO's laptop crashing, such never before hits as Parking Lot Kings, That's the Captains, The Mayor Song, Zonin and the Zonin Remix were just memories.

Until today.

While getting prepared for the 2008 tailgating season, the President and myself stumbled across 3 unlabeled Cd's.

We immediately knew what was found.

So today, I release a track written and performed by the CEO, titled, That's the Captains and paired it up with picture of said DTC Captains.

So turn your speakers up and press play.

Next up for release, The Mayor Song.

And yes. The Mayor Song is Level 10 Gangster.

Interview with The Mayor of FedEx Field

2008-08-23T10:02:00.004-04:00

No. I didn't interview myself, but Dave from Tailgating Ideas did.

Dave called me while the DTC was invading Canton a few weeks back.

Pretty in depth. Take a look here.

Tailgating Ideas is a must read for any tailgater. He is always up to date in everything tailgate related.

Whether it's the latest and greatest tailgate gadget, or tailgate humor, it is probably the greatest blog about tailgating.

While you are on his site, be sure to check out the 14 most annoying tailgaters, and the follow up with 10 more annoying tailgaters. Hilarious, yet accurate!

Top Three Redskin Hats of All-Time

2008-08-22T20:42:00.006-04:00

In case you missed it, Jamie Mottram over at Mr. I found a lost treasure the other day. An original Hogs hat, circa 1985.

Clearly the most gangster hate ever made, I pointed out another gangster hat. The Art Monk Football Camp hat (worn below by The Head Coach of the DTC in Canton, Ohio)

Seeing these hats, both from the 80's, and both 100% nylon mesh, I remembered that I too had a gangster mesh hat from the 80's. Behold the 1983 Super Bowl hat.

25 years old and just like new. They don't make hats like this anymore. Sure, fitteds are hot, but nothing lets your dome piece breath like nylon mesh.

Name change..........

2008-08-22T16:20:00.005-04:00

I thought naming my blog The FedEx Field Fuhrer was clever.

Some people just didnt think so.

I still have a big ego. I still love how awesome I am. Just no more Fuhrer.

In the mean time, im letting YOU, my 17 loyal readers decide what the new name is going to be.

Drop them in the comments section.

Blogging aint easy peeps.

UPDATE: Thanks to some kid I just bought some weed from, the new name of my blog is, Everybody Hates the Mayor. Good job pot head.

It ain't nothing but a DTC Gangster Party

2008-08-09T13:38:00.004-04:00

We came. We conquered. And once again, we proved that there ain't nothing like a DTC Gangster Party!

The DTC has landed in Canton

2008-08-01T16:55:00.012-04:00

Greetings from the lovely Canton Ohio, it's The Mayor of FedEx Field, and this is my first of many blog entries during the HOF festivities.

We left at 10:30 this morning, and arrived here, at the Comfort Inn in Canton at 4.

Not a bad trip at all, as we got here pretty much without hitting any traffic.

I thought I saw Brian Mitchell, but it was a false alarm, but I really did see the Redskin Cheerleaders, as they are staying here as well.

Getting ready to head to Buffalo Wild Wings down the street, hopefully I will have some better material, as this town is pretty fucking boring.

But you know us, the DTC is about to get gangster in Canton.

A DTC first: Cone bongs inside

2008-08-01T16:55:00.011-04:00

The last time I posted, I said we were going to get things started, and started we did. Canton Ohio got its first taste of the DTC as we and another 100 Redskin fans celebrated the upcoming HOF inductions of Redskin legends Art Monk and Darrell Green. I could go into details, but I better the the pictures below tell the story.

Getting ready to "hit the hay", but count on the DTC to continue Redskin madness bright and early Saturday morning.

I will post more pics later when I get the time, but keep checking out the blog for steady updates!

Last time the DTC was at FedEx Field....

2008-07-22T00:16:00.005-04:00

December 30th 2007 is a day that will live in infamy. The Washington Redskins controled their own destiny. The hated Dallas Cowboys were in town. Along with them, their whack ass bandwagon fans.

Did I mention HBO was with the DTC since 8 AM? Yeah. HBO was with the DTC since 8 AM and 2 bottles (2 BOTTLES!) of Crown Royal have been sitting on the ground empty since 10:30.

It was a cold and nasty day. 30 degrees and sleeting, but the DTC stepped it up on the lot. With HBO and an independent film maker video taping our every move, we proved who runs FedEx Field preventing Cowboy fans from not only parking in F-51, but as video evidence shows below, even driving through F-51.

I will steal a line from my main man Warner Wolf.

Let's go to the video tape

40 minutes after this incident, the driver and a few of his buddies came back.

One megaphone was harmed while making that video.

UPDATE: If you wanted to see Redskin fans make breakfast with Chris Pauls Redskins rap tracks in the background. Today is your lucky day.

Happy birthday!

2008-07-16T21:17:00.005-04:00

Happy belated birthday to Hit a Muthafukking Eagle Fan, the music video!

Produced, directed and starring the CEO along with myself, this video has not only gained Redskin and Eagle fans attention, but went world wide when former editor Will Leitch on Deadspin decided he wanted to get into the DTC business.

2 years and about 30,000 views later, haters are still hating and, the DTC is still punching Eagle fans.

With a big season on the horizon, look for more big things from the DTC.

This Sunday we will be at Training Camp, and August 1st through the 4th we will be in Canton, Ohio welcoming Art Monk and Darrell Green into the Hall of Fame. We will also be kicking off the 2008 NFL tailgating season when the Redskins take on the Colts in the Hall of Fame Game.

And I will be live blogging the entire trip!

Chris Cooley is gangster

2008-07-16T15:41:00.007-04:00

Chris Cooley, Pro Bowl Tight End of the Washington Redskins is bringing his gangster status up at record speeds. As probably the most fan friendly athlete Washington has ever seen, Chris and his brother Tanner have just solidified that status with this.

Now. In my opinion, the second prize a signed replithentic Chris Cooley jersey is of better value than the first prize, 2 tickets to the Bills/Redskins preseason game. I usually give my preseason tickets to the local church or to my friends.

But since Chris has left the females out of the contest, the DTC is going to step up and offer 2 of our preseason tickets to the hottest female with a fake beard. That's right ladies, find a fake beard, tape it on your face, get your equally hot friend to do the same, take pictures of yourself, e-mail them to mayor@deadtreecrew.com and you both could go to the game!

Pretty easy. Me and The President will pick a few favorites and post them on this blog for everyone to vote.

Second prize is nothing. So ovaries to the wall!

Should I hate him?

2008-06-27T16:24:00.007-04:00

The King of Dan Snyder Haters, Dave McKenna has written a blog about yours truly.

My first thought was, lets take it to the blog.

My second thought was, lets take it to the street.

But after careful consideration, he and I share the same hatred for Extremeskins and the retards that post on it.

So I can't hate him after all.

But the Mayor has a message for you Dave.

You ain't no daisy.

A sit down with The President of the DTC

2008-06-27T11:39:00.011-04:00

One of the 3 co-founders of the Dead Tree Crew, a pillar of the Redskins tailgating community, my partner in crime, and just an all around awesome person, I sit down with the President of the DTC and ask the questions everyone wants the answers to.

Why do they call you the President?

First Mayor, I would like to thank you for taking time out of your busy day to provide this insight to our fans.

Why am I the President? Well simply because I run shit. Where ever I got it's my show, when I show up I am now in charge!

What’s up with the bullet proof vest?

Well as you well know there is no Vice President of the DTC, therefore I can’t have some Eagle fan assassinate your boy. But in case anything ever goes down you know I have my dog tags on as well.

How many people over the age of 60 have you punched in the face? Why?

Well I can’t say that they were over 60, just like I don’t check ID when hooking up with some young bitch, I don’t check ID when I punch old people in the face, but I have definitely punched a hand full of old people in my life time. Oh and why you ask? Well old people need to be put in line too.

You have an obvious penchant for thievery, name some things you have taken without permission.

Well many fathers would say I stole their daughter’s virginity, but what the fuck do they know. Other than that you can always see the Moss Rd. street sign at our DTC Tailgates, and that doesn’t belong to me, hell I don’t even live on that street. Oh and I can’t forget the numerous golf carts that have been taking for a joy ride as well.

Last season you knocked out an Eagle fan inside the stadium, then threw his girlfriend down the ramp. Is that your all time favorite stadium moment? What is?

Thinking about the Eagle fan dropping like a sack of potatoes always brings a smile to my face, but that is not my favorite. A few years back the Skins were playing the Giants. I arrived at my seat right at kick off. At this time the G-men got off a pretty good kick return. A Giant fan behind me was celebrating as if it was Super Bowl 25 and Scott Norwood just missed the kick wide right. I informed the gentlemen that it was a long game; the giants had the ball at their own 40 and to take it down a notch. I am unable to recall his words at this time but he certainly challenged my authority, but before I could get a word in edge wise he pointed out his son was with him and I need to be respectful. I told him one more outburst like he had earlier I would come over there and use his son as a bat and beat him with his own son. Minutes later Fed-Ex Field Security asked me to get up out of my seat and come with them. We walked in to the corridor and they told me I could be thrown out for acting up. I assured them they would be no more problems. As I returned to my seat, the two female friends I was with were relieved to see I was not thrown out, but informed me that the Giant fan was talking shit after they took me out. I still kept my cool, until the Giants were punting and it was some what quiet in our section, this guy called me "boy" and then asked what security had to say. I told him “they told me to tell you to shut the fuck up”. At this point my fellow Redskins fans also began to give him a verbal lashing. I guess his son learned who really runs shit…me.

You have been anointed a Certified Level 10 Gangster. Care to explain?

In all honesty, there is no explanation needed. Real recognizes real. If you too are as gangster as us then you will know what the fuck I am talking about. Certified Level 10 Gangster sure has a great ring to it though!

Every season, you seem to “kick it up a notch”, What’s in store for this season?

Well there are always additions but at this point there is not too much that I can reveal. Some of our best moves are made last minute, so I am sure we will think of things in the weeks leading up the season, and I don’t want to spoil the surprise either, but rest assured, new rap tracks, new color schemes for the cone, new banners will all make an appearance at F-51 this season.

And last question. Denim or mesh?

Oh, I’m a denim guy, but my favorite shorts to date are the burgundy velour shorts I wore a few years ago. Those were fucking gangster.

If you are dying to know more about The President, check out his MySpace page, or e-mail him at President@deadtreecrew.com

Chris Cooley has made some enemies

2008-06-25T17:09:00.005-04:00

I guess when you a 20 something millionaire, a Pro Bowl Tight End, and just married a cheerleader, haters are going to pop up left and right.

NFL Juice, a blog that gets less hits than mine seems to be leading this hater revolution.

Never heard of NFL Juice? Join the club.

At first glance, its a definite knock off of KSK. But at second glance, they seem to be selling t-shirts as well. In case he didn't know, the Mottram Brothers run the T-shirt racket in this town.

After my third and last glance, the author is a total douche bag. I get it. You hate Chris Cooley because he is better than you in ever category.

And that includes blogging.

Santa Claus moved to Leesburg

2008-06-24T19:32:00.001-04:00

Meet Merton Albert Meade. He just moved down the street from me. And when I say moved, I probably should specify.

Mr. Meade is a registered sex offender. With 10 seperate counts of Indecent Liberties with Children "Mert", is sitting in the brand new jail in Leesburg.

If I had to guess, I would say this gentleman used a Santa Claus suit to trick kids in sucking on his flesh colored candy cane.

For the record, I hate sex offenders. I have had one fired from my work last week, now I search this site daily. Colt Brennan watch out!

UPDATE: Bonus sex offender pic, just because this guy should be on the cover of Sex Offender Illustrated.

UPDATE 2: DAMN!

UPDATE 3: I really could do this all day, but I promise this is the last one. The next time your're in Fairfax City, stop by the local Panera, and make sure you meet Sugarfoot Smith.

I think they like us

2008-06-03T00:36:00.001-04:00

There is no offseason for the DTC, thus there is no offseason for the haters of the DTC.

Probably the greatest picture taken of the DTC Captains, and probably the greatest Photoshop of the DTC Captains. I think it is safe to say, "Jacs" stands for jacks off, because anyone that spends that much time photoshopping the DTC, cannot possibly have ever seen a vagina in person.

More "masterpieces" after the jump

This picture is awesome. The only thing that could make it more awesome, is if I was wearing that red, white, and blue glitter suite myself, and Richard Simmons was wearing the Presidents bullet proof vest.

And I will end it with my all time favorite. A combination of a Redskins victory in Philly, the resurgance of Hit a Motherfucking Eagle fan, and Dan Steinberg visiting us for the first time brought out the best in Philly!

DEAD TREE GROUP??!!! saw ZERO Eagle fans step on F-51 pavement. One Eagle fan disputes this claim however.